Thin…and Fabulous?


Or famished?

So, last night I went to dinner with a good friend who had yet to be informed of my MD prognosis: nothing but PLAIN FOOD indefinitely…

We sat down, and looked at the tapas menu, and I sadly pushed the menu away, moved a piece of plain bread to my plate and began pigeon picking at it.

On the drive over, my friend had indicated that I was looking “thin and fabulous,” to which I whined in response, “but I LOVE food!!!”  And I do!  Anorexia never crossed my mind growing up, even though I always thought my thighs were a little too “thick” for my liking and as of late, I had contemplated extinguishing what I resolved must be “thirties weight” from my waist and hips.  The challenge was too daunting though, as it would require me giving up what I love…pizza, pasta, shrimp tacos…and then I was hit with the stress-stick and in ten days the weight all but fell off my body.

So as I found myself easily slipping into the pair of pants I’ve held onto for three years in hopes of one day fitting into them again, their loose fit only did little to console my extinguished appetite.  Now I know why models always look so pained in their photos…THEY’RE STARVING.

Look at her eyes!  Kate doesn’t even know where she is right now.  She would probably give anything to have half a pepperoni pizza or a big mac.  Even as I type that, my mind drools over the idea of eggplant penne pasta, but my stomach is screaming NOOOO!!!

I’m hoping that potatoes, green beans, toast and yogurt are not going to be my life’s staples, but if this carries on much longer, I might forget all together what fantastic food tastes like…and try my hand at modeling.

I miss food.

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