Dear Chocolate, I will miss you the most of all.
Oh my gosh…white chocolate…Caramilk…CADBURY MINI EGGS…even just uploading that picture has my Pavlovian senses roaring; I can taste it.
If you’ve followed this blog at all, or if you are a friend of mine here in the US, or a member of my family in Canada, you will know that the thing I love more than anything is Canadian chocolate. I would come back to the US with BOXES of Canadian chocolate (yes…I shared!) and I have found myself pushing out of my mind the reality that my next trip back to Canada…I won’t be able to eat what I have once loved ever again.
I may no longer be allowed peaches, pineapple, kidney beans, navy beans, even beef (although the smell of roast beef makes me weak in the knees too), but I realized today that it is Chocolate I am going to miss the most.
It’s interesting how little control our society has over its impulses. My impulse, at the sight of chocolate or the smell of roast beef, is to consume. I WANT it. Exercising self-control and refusing the thing that my senses are acutely indicating I not only want but somehow need is NOT easy.
I actually gave in Sunday. I was doing laundry at a friends house and there was food all around, but none of it was within my dietary code. There was quite possibly the largest tin of cookies on the counter and I thought, it’s been a month, what will be the harm in one?
How many times have we thought, ‘oh, just this once”? And with that fleeting thought, how many times do we entertain the consequences of that potential once before engaging? Sit down, make a pro/con list, ponder the potential outcomes and then make a decision? I have a feeling the answer to that question will mirror the one I concluded on Sunday: none. I had ONE TINY COOKIE. The thing was no bigger than a Canadian Toonie.
I suffered for the next 24 hours.
Was it worth it? Nope.
Sometimes our decision do not have such immediate consequences. Maybe if consequences were always that immediate we would more readily think through the things decide to do?
I will from now on…which is why I bid chocolate a tragic adieu.